Always making
I love making these but I would be lying if I said I’m putting off working on my comic. It is my big fear that it will be awful. Not to you but to me. I have played this out so many times in my head that I’m not sure I can live up to it but I’m going to try because you have to least try and rework it until you love your work. Always work to be better.
My teacher taught me to keep working at it and never give up ….so I will even with my fears…..cus…..Fuck Fear!
I think in this time of men and women or women and men….depends on how you feel I guess, we are alive on two plains. One of bone and one of digital wires. I am no real difference. I crave the likes and shares like the the rest of you but I don’t want that to change why or how I paint and make short films. I want to learn a lot this year in my craft from other masters and so I have started studying again in classes. It is a huge step in my life to restart but I feel I’m up for it. I never knew there where so many ways to say “I love you” with a brush to a canvas. It feels like I learned a new sex trick. I can’t wait to surprise my wife with this just to see her smile.
With this one I have learned how to better curve my brushes and make the best points for my lines. I love my brushes so this feels so natural to take care of them in the best way.
I hope you enjoy. Also how are you? Are you taking any classes this year or taking on any new projects? I would love to hear about them in the comments.
Grande parte de mim está cansado. (Much of me is tired.)Living as a painter is insane but I yearn for it.As I become more and more into my work I take off my shoes. Creativity feels like making wine, you will be covered up to your knees and it may stain you. It is rich and earthy.
Just letting go to float in the ocean of my mind and let the colors color.
I just love making art. Its very simple. No magical answer. We are drawn to our passions. We are the pen point of focus and in that I feel at home. The world drafts away and I feel chingon.
I couldn’t sleep last night. It took me what felt like a life time to rest for a minute. It comes in waves. Years back when these moments attacked me I would stand up and paint until i couldn’t do anything but pass out. I’m not sure I will ever be that man again. He was insane and I’m only whiling to find madness it spurts. Art is my meditation and my drug…..plus drugs.
I remember the first time I saw myself as a painter. I was in a famous black professor of art’s studio. He took me under his wing. I’m not sure if he thought of it that way but I was swept up in the magic of the smells of his studio. Charles Rogers changed my life I those moments of simply saying “do you think it is done? Are you sure you feel done? Give me another hour of that painting.” It drove me to madness and in that madness I found my style. Now when I paint I search inside for the madness to lead me. The colors are the wild beast screaming just under me heart and fingers. They are a pipeline to restfulness. I can always tell a “real” painter from a talker of art because that madness is a drug I crave and it leave a look in the eyes. A hunger that needs more then food and sleep and sex. Honestly until my Alec nothing but the madness gave peace and rest. She saved me from me. I have to push my self to the edge of madness with the brush and her heart beat is my anchor.
My first job ever I was 15. I worked at a theme park taking pictures and developing 1,000 negatives a day. I have always loved cameras as long as I can remember. My mom had a old camera with lots of lens and a rainbow thread shoulder strap. Still to this day i wish she would give it to me. I’m not even sure it would still work but it was just so beautiful.
I remember the day in college I learned I would have to take pictures of my own work. I felt really nervous mainly because I had so many amazing friends who were photographers and I didn’t see my self as one anymore. There was this theory i subscribed to that said “you are only one thing 100% at a time.” Naturally I outgrew that but it took me a while.
I have so many cameras now but my new one is my Holga.
It is a very simple camera but it makes me happy and I figure that is the point.
So much of all these bits and pieces I paint I try to feel parts of me in. The lines are my mind’s footprints. 
I ran into some old Japanese toys I always wanted but could never have so I went out and grabbed 10lbs of clay. I’m excited and my mind is running with ways to make a statue/ figure that I can make like theirs but with my style. I figure I will if I love them ….sell them at shows.
I keep thinking something like this but for one of these
.
Plus I really want to make a bunch of toys. I have always dreamed of being a vinyl toy maker.
jaws_blake 