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Reacting into the void and expecting comfort.

I was a duckling same as you and the fluff fell out and I never felt what it meant to be cold again. Childhood left me and as I reached for the stars above me in the middle of the night on a sun deck at a lake house I felt the true disconnect of existence. The true cold was the loneliness. I forgot it and it forgot me, two strangers see each other naked across a skyline and not knowing what to do.

Reaching out into the void, mentally wet.

Deep makings

I feel like I’m on a journey. And a journey to find my true self none the less. I don’t know if I’m really looking for the sales anymore so much is the honesty and being creative. I just wanna make something so powerful that it touches people because I’m so passionate about it.

Life in color

I think I have this moment that I’ve been waiting for to really make an impact since the pandemic started. I’m starting to see it faintly. I was thinking it was with Tiktok but then I started scrolling and it’s nothing there.

No jabs at a place like that but they don’t want great art as much as they want silly videos. I’m silly just not in that way. Then there is Youtube and IG, they don’t really want a lot of great artist either. They have more of us there but they also just want to be entertained in a mindless way. I used to wish I could tap into that but I feel like I might loss myself in the chase. So I’m here, rambling but also finding a real truth in myself.

I feel like I have a real fan base and maybe I need to love them back fully. I have known so many of you for so long. I’ve even talked to you in your last few days alive. It’s heartbreaking but beautiful that you share so much with me. I want to give you the gifts of my work and connect better with you. So please feel free to contact me at painterfilespodcast@gmail.com.

Also feel free to join my mailing list for little art gifts.

Tchau,

Jaws

I try to walk around and take a few photos a week.

I have a few for a painting I’m working on now.

I wish I could say something amazing after all this but I’m tired and my body hurts because it’s Fall. Happy Fall.